Most Recent Episodes
Don’t Be A Victim In Your Relationships
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 15:36 — 21.5MB)
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“Don’t Be A Victim In Your Relationships.” It is a podcast addressing the mentality of playing the victim in our relationships. I explain how being victimized doesn’t mean we have to become a victim. Don’t become a victim. The mentality we connect to the trauma or experience is within our control. What we can’t control is the fact that it happened. Don’t waste time trying to manage what was and focus all your energy on what can be. Understand the role you played (if any), reach out and get the other side of the story, get closure if you are moving on, or reconcile if you want to repair what’s broken. Whatever you do, never make a victim of yourself.
Listen, Learn, and Apply.
Enjoy
Are Accountable and Healthy Relationships A Priority?Â
Are Accountable and Healthy Relationships A Priority?
Prioritizing Our relationships is essential to a quality of life. Yet, many of us don’t know where to start. There are not enough hours in the day, something more glaring tends to arise, or our plates are full.Â
So, how do we maintain the health of our relationships?Â
These are four ways to get started:
1)Â Â Creating a list of the most paramount people to you.
I know you think everyone is essential, but they would already be a priority instead of a passing thought if that were the case. So, make that list! Go from most vital to I can do without. Once you form an honest and straightforward list., look at the top four people. Think about where you stand with those people and where they stand with you. Are you planning time with them? Are you transparent and open about how you feel about them? Is your relationship with them as strong as it can be? If the answer is “NO” to any three questions, make it right. Prioritize the health of your relationships. Start by asking your top four people to comprise their list. See where you fit on theirs. Ask them why you are so “low or high” on their list. Start a dialog that allows you both to take inventory of your connection. This discussion may bring you closer and push you further apart, but it will definitely grant you clarity.Â
2)Â Create a weekly schedule.
Every Sunday ( or whatever day you choose), take an hour to look at your week and pen people in. We are not teens anymore. We Maintain the accountability and health of our relationships by planning our lives. Remember, planning is prioritizing. Anyone that feels restricted by plans isn’t ready for a commitment. Constructing a weekly schedule allows you to see where you place your time and makes you more dependable. If your friends know you will meet up with them at a specific time, they can count on you being present in their lives. This is not to say you all can’t meet outside of the schedule. But, it does reassure them this is definitely their time, and you value them. Creating planners (schedules) also allows us to take control of our lives.
We look forward to the week when we can see everything planned. Our relationships will benefit from our positive energy if we are more satisfied.Â
3)Â Prioritizing your issues prioritizes your fun.
Nothing is worse than spending time with someone who has luggage (baggage). We smile, laugh, and joke, but the underline issues are festering. When you have a problem with someone you “Love,” make the time to solve it. Wouldn’t you better enjoy your time with people on the same page? I know, I would! When a problem emerges, why are we so scared to address them? A negative view of “conflict,” a negative belief of the individual, or lack of accountability. Whatever the reason, you disrupt the relationship when you decide to take their choice away. Think of it like this, issues are stop signs, and you can’t go until they are resolved. You can run the red light, but eventually, a crash will ensue. The best thing to do is stop, discuss, and see where you both stand. Remember, our minds are not reality. Live out loud. When you prioritize your issues, you prioritize the health of your relationships. Healthy and accountable relationships equal unadulterated fun.Â
4)Â Make Life Plans Together.
Bonds are vital to maintaining accountable and healthy relationships. So, how do we establish strong bonds? Find a purpose in each other lives. Base your connection on something concrete and progressive, like support with raising children, running an organization, exercising together. Anything that would bring value to one another’s lives while also honoring a commitment. We all have joined relationships with people because they shared our traumas, our vices, or they were just something to do. How did that work out? I know it wasn’t productive or eventful for me. When we are ready for accountable and healthy relationships, we want people connected to us blossoming. As we build those bonds, we see how we are better together. Don’t settle for anything less than that mentality.Â
There are more ways to ensure our relationships remain accountable and healthy, but you will be guaranteed a foundation if you exercise these four.Â
Start maintaining or building your accountable and healthy relationships.
Are Accountable and Healthy Relationships A Priority?
By The LoveSnobs
We Don’t Want Relationships
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 22:24 — 30.8MB)
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We Don’t Want Relationships.
We don’t want relationships because we believe they are hard. What is so hard about having support in life. People who are genuinely working together to enhance one another lives. Not for individual gain but collective success.Â
In this week’s podcast, “We Don’t Want Relationships,” Aziz doesn’t just discuss why we do want relationships but how to start looking forward to building accountable and healthy relationships. It is, however, The AccountableLove Podcast, and the focus is to improve the state of people’s relationships.
Aziz covers four ways to build the connections you want during the podcast.Â
We must care about people: He is not discussing your simple cordiality of saying good morning, having Smalltalk in passing, or assisting someone who needs support at the moment. Aziz discusses prioritizing your Loved ones by getting to know them.Â
Sensibility:Â Wanting to be in a relationship takes being sensible, functioning in “better practice,” always thinking about the big picture, and wanting to come to resolutions in conflict.Â
Empathy: You don’t want a connection if you can’t look at life from another person’s perspective. Before making life decisions, we should consider how those decisions affect others in our lives. Empathy is the bond of every relationship.
Purpose: Without purpose, why have any connections? Purpose is everything. It is the energy that travels and merges souls. It is why we chose one person over the next. Sharing a purpose is the destination we want to settle in together. We don’t want relationships if we don’t have a unified reason for being in each other’s lives.Â
We all want strong bonds! People in which you wish to share life. So if you don’t want relationships, you have never met the right people. After listening to this podcast, you will know what it takes to be the right person and surround yourself with complementary people.
Enjoy This podcast discussion and Listen, Learn, and Apply.Â
Why Do We Cater In Our Relationships?
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 33:36 — 46.2MB)
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Why Do We Cater In Our Relationships?
In this week’s AccountableLove podcast, Aziz examines healthy and unhealthy ways to cater. He urges the listeners to ask themselves why they cater to their relationships. Is it for self-promotion or relationship stability? The answer will determine whether you are in an Accountable, Healthy, Support relationship or not.
Why do we cater in our relationships? If you are asking yourself, what does it mean to cater? It’s defined to serve, service, or provide what is required or desired. We cater in our relationships for various reasons: To strengthen our connections, to resolve conflict, we feel obligated, or we pitied them. Either way, we want to meet their desires because we see a purpose for them being in our lives.Â
Here are the four reasons Aziz will discuss:Â
Pity:Â We sometimes cater because we feel sorry for the person in our lives. We should never cater out of pity, and Aziz will explain why.Â
Obligation:Â We cater out of Obligation. We should never feel like we have to. Catering should be a want.Â
Conflict:Â We cater based on conflict. Conflicts are good if the purpose is to resolve. If you are willing to resolve disputes, you cater to your relationships.Â
Love:Â We cater in our relationships because of Love. We promised to give our Loved ones the best of us. We are catering when we are honoring that promise daily.Â
Aziz chose these four reasons because they are either known or unknown, but they need to be identified to have an accountable and healthy relationship. The goal is Accountablelove.Â
We hope you enjoy this podcast and, as always, Listen, Learn, and Apply. Build Accountable Relationships through AccountableLove.Â
By The LoveSnobs
Wounded By Wounds
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 41:13 — 56.6MB)
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Wounded By Wounds podcast features Mahagony B. She is working on a series of films, books, and short videos addressing our traumas. “Wounded” is the name of the series. Her purpose is to start the healing process by giving people a platform to face these traumas openly and honestly. The goal is to examine the scars people talk about, don’t discuss, and don’t know they are experiencing.
Yet, Mahagony and Aziz will be talking about her wounds in this podcast discussion. She has experienced most people’s traumas in her lifetime, but she refuses to be her traumas. So, Mahagony takes the first step by showing the world the importance of showing every aspect of ourselves.
If you aren’t examining your wounds after this, I don’t know what would cause you to examine them. It took courage to allow Aziz to ask on camera, but Mahagony was willing and able. I hope you listen, learn, and apply.
Check out this podcast, examine your wounds, start healing and stop being Wounded.
Contact Mahagony at her email address mosartsentertainmentllc@gmail.com or social media page for more information.
More Information about The “Wounded” Series:
Mahagony is planning a tour in 2022. She will show the film, answer questions, encourage people to share their experiences, and hopefully, the book will be available for purchase. She is very passionate about this project because she knows everyone is a work in progress, but they must be progressing.
Big Things Are Coming!
Enjoy!
Words Need Context In Relationships
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 30:46 — 42.3MB)
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Why Words Need Context In Relationships? We use words like Change, Judgment, Cheater, Joy, Partner, and Friend without giving direction to form a genuine connection. All these words have definitions, but they are vague without contexts. Believing our general statements have clarity without context is like moving our mouths without words. We are not communicating effectively. In this week’s discussion on “The AccountableLove Podcast,” Aziz will further discuss the importance of taking the time to forge a connection to the words we use.Â
Some Of The Words Defined In The Podcast
Change: There is a variety of ways we can change. We can change to improve our standing or change to worsen our livelihood. Change is happening all around us. So, when we use “change,” we should provide context. Â
Judgment:Â Judgment is required to make good or bad choices. People typically use “judgment” to say someone is being overly critical. Yet, we are constantly judging; who, what, where, when! We are “judging,” deciding who is being judgmental. Words Need Context!
Cheater: We cheat physically, emotionally, and psychologically. How do we deem who is a cheater and who is not? we need context to explain we can call someone a “cheater.”Â
Joy: Joy has a definition, but sometimes we use it to express feelings of revenge, hurting someone, and hiding pain from a breakup. Joy as a stand-alone means to bring relief or pleasure. Without context, how do we know when we are misusing a word.
Partner: Partner can be romantic, business, workout, etc. When we use the word independently, the receiving parties are left to discern the relationship and can cause complications. We need the identifying ord to give it context and show a connection.
Friend: Like the word partner, friendship has degrees. Everyone is not our friend, nor can they be, which further supports we all must “judge.” Because of that “friend” standard, we must give it context. The context allows us to identify the traits that separate friend from foe from a stranger.Â
Listen to The AccountableLove Podcast, Learn, and Apply.Â
Enjoy!
Tell The Truth
Secrets!
Tell The Truth! It is perfectly “normal” to keep them, but it’s also normal to gossip, smoke cigarettes, and have poor relationships. Is our goal normal or healthy? Keeping secrets from the people we Love isn’t healthy. It’s the clogged artery of our relationships. We are on borrowed time until we have a heart attack. We are forcing our relationship into crisis instead of focusing on our relationship’s health. When the truth most likely would have set us free, it would have bought us closer together.
Uncovering!
Mostly come with excuses, justifications, and passive-aggressive tactics when the truth continues to be the cure. So, why do we keep secrets? Mainly because we live in the past and present, never seeing how silence will lead to silencing our future. Tell The Truth! Easier said than done. But it is easy, open your mouth and speak. Trust the person on the other side of your confession is listening and will decide what fits the crime.
Fairness!
We hope to get a fair trial yet continue to mistrust the system. Forgetting, we helped build and agreed to honor this system. We choose the people in our lives. We promised to give them “choice.” So, why do we unfairly, unjustly break that promise? Because we are scared of the outcome. We are choosing to focus more on how you feel or what we would lose as a pose to honoring our commitments.
Tell The Truth!
Tell The Truth!
We connect secrets to independence. Believing we are entitled to our secrets when we promise to share our thoughts. Deception does not free us. It locks us in a self-prison and isolates us from the people we Love. Remember, they want to know us, all of us.
Tell The Truth!
Love Is A Group Journey!
When we start living life concurrently, we stop keeping secrets and start working through everything as a team. Whether we believe it will help or not. Open up! Vulnerability will begin a problematic discussion, but it will eventually establish an unbreakable bond.
Tell The Truth!
From Romantic Partners To Friends and Co-Parents
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 43:43 — 60.6MB)
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From Romantic Partners to friends and co-parents
We tend to look at our relationships in a neat, orderly fashion. Our spouses aren’t our friends, our friends could never be our spouses, and co-parents can’t be friends. We disagree. We believe it is healthier to see our spouse as a friend before romantic partners if we single our friends as possible spouses. Co-parents can continue to be friends after a disconnect romantically. Aziz & Jasmine are proof. This week’s podcast discusses how we went from romantic partners to friends and co-parents.
AccountableLove is looking at why someone is in your life and if they continue to have value in your life. We encourage our listeners to listen closely to why the choices were made and reexamine their choices. You don’t have to be enemies with someone you Love because the tended relationship didn’t work out.
So, listen, learn, and apply. Enjoy this week’s Podcast From Romantic Partners to friends and co-parents.
The LoveSnobs
Maintaining Accountable Relationships
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 42:06 — 57.9MB)
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When “Maintaining Accountable Relationships,” multiple variables come into play. In this podcast, Aziz highlights four important ways to identify accountable relationships. The four-component Mr. LoveSnob will address “Knowing Who You Are,” “Knowing Who They Are,” ” Forming and Honoring Agreements,” and ” Understanding Where You Disagree.” All four of these indicators will assure your relationships remain healthy and Accountable.
Knowing Who You Are:
Understand your likes and dislikes, dos and don’ts, Your hows, whys, whats. Being self-aware is an essential component in joining and maintaining accountable relationships.
Know Who They Are:Â
First encounters are a great tone starter. Ask questions that allow you to understand their core values. What people believe will ultimately make their decisions. Also, discuss preference, hobbies, future goals, how much the past affects them, etc. Understanding what makes them tick is vital.Â
Forming and Honoring Agreements:Â
Once each person can identify each other identities, it is time to build the agreements. When discussing arrangements, both people must start with their convictions. All the attributes that make them who they are. What they will not change or adjust. After all, beliefs are understood, start planning a life together—for example: what they can enjoy together and what is cool to do apart.
Understand Where You Disagree:Â
If you avoid conflict, it will create unhealthy relationships. When you disagree, discuss those disagreements as soon as possible. Everyone must be on the same page when talking about faith, future settlement plans, children, and purpose. Tv shows, books, vacations, and some topic discussions can remain parallel. Yet, the ultimate goal is to come to agreements.
Â
If you are on social media, you already know that Jerri will not be joining me this season. Jerri will work more behind the scene than in front of the camera. She juggled podcasting, a 9 to 5, accountable relationship-building sessions, and daily messages. We thought it would benefit the company if she weren’t spread thin. How can our message be Love Is A Group Journey if we do not care about one of our own?
So listen, learn, and apply.
Enjoy The AccountableLove Podcast.
Why are we in relationships, Looking Past Them?
Why Are We In Relationships, Looking Past Them?
Sitting in an empty house wishing a partner would share our space. We are dating several people at a time, passing the months. We have several engagements from different apps and three or four fit-ups( by friends and family).
Searching!
We narrow it down to the person who shares our vision for life—the person who makes us feel like they would add variety to a straightforward existence.
We bond!
Life starts to look incomplete without a commitment. So, we decide. Decide to go from you and me to us.
Two years approach. We are sitting in a house staring into the eyes of a person who has become multiple questions.
Where is this going?
Are we going to have children?
Is this relationship the end?
Things aren’t horrible. Actually, they are the best we have ever encountered, making the next steps seem vital. So, we broach the topics. It’s confirmed marriage is a mutual goal, and kids can be conceived tonight after work f we wish. Every question is answered. Meaning our life is back on track. The house is starting to have a future.
Why are we in Relationships
Now, we have two children, defined roles in life, and employment with security. Yet, the house is never empty. We find ourselves wishing for space. Life feels crowded. Partner, children, never-ending responsibilities, we are overwhelmed. For several hours a day, we miss the emptiness of a house with no partner, children, responsible. We start to resent the younger us. We start taking our lives for granted.
Guilty!
Those thoughts are locked away in silence.
Projecting!
We wonder if our partner feels the same when they kiss our lips—staring deep into their eyes.
Searching!
We search for recognition in their soul. But, nothing, nothing but Love, gratitude, and sadness when they see something in our eyes.
Your partner asks,
“What is wrong?”
Guilty!
Why are We In Relationships,
At first, you think to lie, but guilt, not honor, encourages you to be honest. Your partner looks you in the face and says,
“We are in this together,
and if you feel overwhelmed,
don’t make me the enemy.”
“Honor our agreement to be fair, honest, straightforward, and devoted.” They continue, “You are not cheating on me because of your thoughts. You’re fooling with your silences.”
“Silence will break us.”
At that second,
You acknowledge why independence is the death of interdependence. Forgetting you had a person who would work with you. Cry in relief, shake your head “yes.” In that moment, you stop living in your head and start to live the life you both built aloud.
Love Is A Group Journey means sharing life, not assuming life!
Think About It!