LoveSnobs 101: Emotions Shouldn’t Stop Honest Communication

A classic mistake we make in relationships is limiting our communication to spare each other’s emotions.

Yes — it’s essential not to be harmful with our words. Our intent should never be to cause damage. But as the old saying goes, “the truth hurts.” It’s the truth that stings, not necessarily the terms it comes in. Too often, we go searching for someone or something to blame instead of listening with the intent to have a real dialogue and work on our weaknesses.

When our loved ones tell us we’re beautiful, smart, and great, we accept “the truth” easily. But when they have to tell us they aren’t attracted to us anymore, or that we haven’t been prioritizing them, or even that they cheated — suddenly we demand the right wording, delivered exactly the way we see fit. It doesn’t work that way. We should know the people we love well enough to listen for the intention, not the word choice.

Communicating with a friend or partner isn’t the same as dealing with a co-worker or a stranger. Both take active listening. But with the people closest to us, we can afford to be more direct — because they understand our many layers. With friends and partners, we should be comfortable with no sugarcoating, because they know our intent and we know theirs.

So let’s work on seeing truthfulness as thoughtfulness — not as something harsh or hurtful.

The LoveSnobs