Accountable Parenting Is Tough Love
Accountable parenting is tough love. It means having the discussions our children want to have — and the ones they don’t.
In this video, Jerri (Ms. LoveSnob) shares a conversation she had with her daughter about one of the most important lessons a kid can learn: how to recognize when someone is actually in your corner.
The Back Story
Camille, Jerri’s daughter, took her teacher’s tough love as being singled out.
Camille has an assertive personality, and her teacher had identified her as a leader. One day, Camille and two other girls finished their assignment early and started talking while their classmates were still working. The teacher asked them to stop, since the others were still testing. The girls kept talking. So he asked them to step into the hallway — and they rolled their eyes on the way out.
In the hallway, the teacher expressed his disappointment. When he finished with the group, he asked Camille to stay back. That’s the moment she felt singled out.
His reasoning: “Camille, if you had listened the first time, the other two would have followed.”
Camille pushed back: “They’re their own people. I’m not responsible for what they do, and I shouldn’t have to be.” A valid point.
“I’m not saying it’s your fault they’re talking,” the teacher explained. “I’m saying I believe if you do what’s best, they’ll follow suit.”
“That’s still saying it’s my fault,” Camille replied, frustrated.
“I can’t argue with you right now, Camille — but we can discuss it after class.”
“I’m good,” Camille said, and walked back in.
Jerri’s Response
The teacher emailed Jerri afterward. But Camille had already filled her in — one of Camille’s most remarkable qualities. Jerri reviewed both sides, which wasn’t hard, because Camille’s account and the teacher’s mirrored each other almost exactly. Eye-rolling and all.
Accountable Parenting is tough love. And so is teaching.
Here’s how Jerri handled it. Watch the video.
